Wake up, Buttercup, Sober Sleep Timeline in Recovery

Traveling and drinking start out the same and end the same.  They start out with excitement, they take you out of your comfort zone, they open your mind to new things, you eat things that you'd probably cringe at on a normal day...  Then, after years and years of either or both, they end the same.  To simplify: They do horrible things to your pooper and your sleeper.   Your rhythm.  Your groove.  The ebb and flow that all people need.

The ocean rolls its tide in a 24 hr clock and everything is predictable.  Flowers open and close according to this same 24 hour clock.  The universe, as we know it,  flows accordingly.  Most non-drinkers flow accordingly.  Drinkers take their sleeping rhythm and slam it into a wall every day until it knocks you out cold.  If you're like me, you spent the last decade drinking to sleep, but never really getting rested.  You try all of the pills because...that is an addict's solution.  But, I can honestly tell you that after struggling to get rest for about a decade.  I am getting it now. I am sleeping.  I am pooping and sleeping. 

1-30 Days: The Coma.

For 30 days, you will only wake up to eat and cry.

Let me tell you how this transition back to real sleep happened.  It started in rehab.  I stopped drinking.  I slept for at least a month straight.  I do not think it was real sleep, only my body trying to reach a resting place while my eyes were closed.  I zombied it out of bed to eat and tell sob stories but promptly went back to bed.  I was sleeping 15-20 hours a day.  The girl in the room next to me threw a shoe at a counselor because the counselor kept waking her from "the coma.".  She did all of the drugs before she decided to get clean.  I hope she is well.    

30-60 days: Do none of the things. 

You will feel extreme fatigue. 

Then, I came home from rehab,  and I slept.  I slept for 3 days straight.  I would occasionally get woken to be told to eat or walk the dogs.  But, then I slid back into my coma.  On the 3rd day at home, I woke up to my boyfriend bear hugging me into the sitting position.  I don't know if he was worried about me, just bored, or just needed me to shower.  In my memory I imagine it like a sleeping beauty scenario.  I am sure it was more of a drooling, stinky, sack of potatoes scenario.  30 days was the end of my coma.  But, I still did not become a well rested member of the awake world.  I was still sleeping multiple hours during the day and sleeping 14 hours a night.  But, it was never restorative sleep. 

60-90 days:  I just need a nap.

Slowly you are working your way back to a normal sleep pattern.

I would like to say I had great sleep patterns after 60 days.  I did not.  I have always been a morning person, but I was not.  For the next 30 days I went to bed at 8-9 pm and woke up at about 10 am.  I averaged 12-14 hours of sleep a day.  That lasted until 90 days slowly getting shorter and shorter.  But, I never woke up feeling great.  I felt fatigued.  I was living in a state of Valium and Ambien confusion but without either of them inside of me.


90-100 days:  I'm baaaack!

1...2...skip a few, 99...100.  My 100th day sober.  I woke up smiling at 6:51 am.  I rolled over and said, "Good morning!"  And, he said, "She's baaaack!"

If you're struggling with your sleep, be patient.  It leveled out for me.  I feel like I am walking on sunshine when I wake in the mornings now.  I know I am getting real rest.  If you're struggling with your pooper, be patient.  It came for me.  One day it came and came and came.  Stay tuned for my next blog for the deets  if you're not scared of TMBI.  Too much butt information.  


Remember: Your Journey Will Vary

Of course no sober person's journey is the same.  Some will breeze through it. (assholes)  Some will be stuck longer than anticipated.  I, of course, only can speak from what I felt and hopefully it gives you hope or just makes your feel better about yourself.  It was my first time getting sober.  It will be my last time. (Pats myself on back for confidence.)  Tell me your sober journey back to your Zzzzzz's! 

Hang in there.