7 Things I've Learned in 7 Months Sober
1. I have an SOBER identity.
I've learned to identify with my positive traits instead of my negative traits. Something happened after the first 3 months that made me lose touch with feeling like an addict that was always playing offense to her addiction. I do not identify with that anymore. I am not saying that I do not play offense when caught off guard, but generally I operate with defense. I live a sober life. I identify with being SOBER...not an addict. I protect my sobriety because it has started being a part of me. Not the biggest part. But, a strong part of my lifestyle.
2. We rise by lifting others.
I try to inspire hope in everyone I meet. And, I associate with people who do the same. I have always been very selective in my friends. I always have respected my friends and would not associate with someone that was not a good person. Quality over quantity on this one.
3. I have BOUNDARIES.
I am actively learning to say no to people at work, at home, to friends, to acquantances...you get it. The answer is no sometimes. I am still actively trying to say no without following the no with an excuse or an apology. You cannot do it all. This is ok.
4. I can let sadness be sadness.
I am not squashing bad feelings. I am letting myself feel them and cry or feel them and be angry. I surprise myself every time I have a feeling. It is a new thing for me to absorb so much. But, instead of being scared of my feelings like I was, I am excited because it is an opportunity to learn from them. I am surrounding myself with people who forgive me for being a basket-case most of the time.
5. I am planning for a future instead of living day to day.
I have been counting days sober for a long time and have recently begun to stop counting as much. I checked my counter today...229 days. Woot woot. I believe in approaching things one day at a time and living in the present when it comes to anxiety and control. But, this is where I differ from AA. I am making future plans. I have a yearly planner. I am setting goals in the near and far future. AA rules are very strict about when you can do things in your first year, which I do not 100% agree with. I believe everyone is an individual and everyone has his/her own recovery timeline. But, me, I am sober for the past me, present me, and future me.
6. My family is hard to be around.
I mean, SERIOUSLY. I have a lovely family, but I never realized what a role they played in my alcohol abuse. I am thankful to say that with 7 months behind me, I can sit in the living room while my loved one downs x glasses of wine watching TV. I can mention to them that it is not good their health and I can handle it when they discount my opinions. I can just drink Diet Coke and go to bed.
7. I am happy.
I feel everything. But, I am definitely happy.