Dry January Blues
I'm just a girl sitting here on the sofa, thinking blah blah blah. Yep, I can barely even compell myself to write any of these words. The January blues have me under their spell. It is grey and it is cold outside. The trees are barren. The snow is gone, but the ground is still frozen solid. There is really not much beautiful out there.
I am an outdoors sort of person. A woman of the wild. My ex used to joke that one day he'd look outside and I'd be sleeping in the back garden. I love being outside that much. But, when it gets to be this time of year I get an extreme case of seasonal affected disorder. I had this extremely badly in London because I literally never saw the daylight in January. The days were so short that they came and went while I was in my workplace. Needless to say, this is when I started my heavy drinking. The drinking continued, but the locations changed and never to a sunnier climate.
Now, I am experiencing the dull grey days of January completely sober in Chicago. It is getting to me. I am hearing the call of my old friend red wine saying "drink me for comfort." But, alas, I made a decision to never drink again. I will not be drinking any alcohol for solace and relaxation. I am going to try new things. I cannot be coached into happiness when the temper outside controls so much of my own. But, I can be guided into being more active when the weather gets me down. And, that is the goal folks. Progress not perfection.